If Eric Balfour who played Gabe in Six Feet Under and Lee from 90's pop group Steps somehow had a love child that grew to the age of 27 then didn't eat for a month, surviving only from the sustenance of Cooper's Pale Ale, that'd be me. I have the body of a pregnant praying mantis.
Once upon a time back in the days I was a fitness freak, I had a lovely lean body with abs of steel. Oh those were the days......
I've been trying to drag myself kicking and screaming back onto the fitness train (toot toot!) with about as much sucess in relation to results as trying to teach a hippo to do a cartwheel. The abs are coming back but I can't say much else is happening, apart from of course my butt is looking a bit more bubbly and lets face it, that's pretty near the top of the list of 'most important'.
My routine has been as follows : 50 push-ups, 50 sit ups, 50 lunges and anywhere between 25-50 chin ups depending on when my arms give way and then subsequently find it difficult to even lift a pen. All this followed by a 5km run.
I'd have to say the run is definitely the most enjoyable part, apart from one small factor. I CAN NOT listen to my iPod while running. I generally run along a track that goes between scrub land and the beach that is used by many a jogger, so if I'm listening to said iPod when someone runs up behind me without warning, of course my instant response is to nearly scream and go into the battle position of a gay ninja. A positive of running along this track is when a middle aged woman starts catching up, my instant thought is 'you're not beating me menopause-central' and pick up to a Speedy Gonzales-like pace.
Fitness hasn't been the only thing I've been self-improving on : I've also shaved all my hair off. My original hope on shaving the hair off was to have the look of a sexy bad-boy European who had escaped from a correctional facility, but due to a nasty case of hayfever and lack of sleep, I'd wager right now it's a tad more akin to looking like Sinead O'Connor after having gastro.
I'm giving it a week to adjust to the new hair. As for the body, maybe by summer 2017 it'll be all sexy?